hello myself. it's Tuesday today and here I am saying nonsense.
I still has not turn the heater on.
the weather is not cold but I must check the heater to see if it world properly or not.
yesterday I practiced breathing a lot. but I don't know why I'm not doing it properly tonight. as I said before I have a kind of congenital heart disease called pulmonary. so I should breath deeply because there is not enough Oxygen in my vassals.
so I have to rise the amount of oxygen in my blood by breathing deeply.
shallow breathing make me insufficient and unable to do my job properly.
I live alone in a room not even a house. maybe would write sth about that but not today. let's do that tomorrow.
today I've just wrote about breathing and my heart condition. also I have to go to see a practitioner because I still have problem in my right knee.
I'm exercising everyday. I don't know if it is harmful to my knee or not?
I've seen a really stupid man yesterday. I was out...I wanted to buy some bread. so I went to bakery.
and this stupid man saw me and started talking:
why he wants to buy 15 bread? oh! he wants to sell them!
and he continued talking....
there is corona virus. god created this virus because people do not worship the god as they should be.
when I was coming back, to home with bread in my hand, another stupid man appeared.
he shouted at me:
I'm angry now. why did you buy too many bread?
at first I didn't understand what did they mean but this stupid people thought I want to sell this bread or something else.
I think they are stupid because as long as there is no evidence, you should not accuse people.
yesterday another thing happened. it was about my scholars...but maybe I would talk about this another time.
I was working on Japanese. I have learnt more 6000 words and more than 2000 kanji. but I still can not read Japanese.
I think that I'd better to just read the sentences in 5000 words of Japanese book.
it's been a long time. a few years...maybe...I' just struggle to learn Japanese.
every time I forgot the whole words and I have to learn them again. also I don't wanna give it up.
it's very important. I've spent several years of my life learning Japanese. and there's no any positive result.
I wish I did not try to learn this fucking language.
it's not impossible to learn it but I do not have the text. I must have some text to read. that's the only way to work on may vocabulary.
but unfortunately I can not find that. so I have to read the sentences of that book...
I'm also not good at writing English but it's not a problem. I will be better and better. I just have to work on my English everyday. I can imagine that I can not speak Japanese but there is no way I can imagine that I can not understand and speak English. that would be horrible.
it's been 7 days since I started daily cold shower program. I'm actually excited to see what will I learn in 2th week.
I know there is some push ups. breathing exercises and cold shower for sure...
I'm going to bakery tomorrow. the breads I stored in the freezer are running out. so I have to buy some breads from the bakery. people staring at me. probably they think what the hell is this guy doing? why should he buy so much breads? maybe he has10 wife or maybe one wife with 9 children.
no! I have some heart disease people! I'm just trying to be safe. because of the fucking corona virus. I don't wanna get sick.
eventhough I'm always wearing a mask I don't wanna go to the bakery every day. so every 20 days I go to the bakery and buy 15 loves of Sangak and store them in the freezer. I remember last time I bought some breads from bakery that was heavy. I had to carry it a few hundred meters to my house. when I finally got home it was difficult for me to open the door because I could not find the key in my pants pocket easily.
I finally opened the door and wrapped the bread in freezer nylon .
ok. it's enough bullshit for today.
it gets harder for me to write on this blog everyday. I really don't know what to say and write about what.
but as I said before, it is one of my daily tasks so it must be done.
I've been doing all the daily task since Sunday. today will be a sunny day for sure if I do all the daily tasks.
there is a heater in my room but I did not turn it on yet.
actually I did not connect the heater pipe to the chimney.
I must do that. it's getting colder and colder. I can bear the cold maybe but maybe the cold air would not be good to my lungs.
his days I'm just downloading. I wish I was in another country so I could use cheap and fast internet. but this is not possible cause I live in fucking hell.